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Submitted on
October 4, 2012
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Theme 58: Kick in the Head

How lucky can one guy be?
I kissed her, and she kissed me.
Like a fella once said, "Ain't that a kick in the head!"


That song kept playing on a loop inside my mind as I walked home. I couldn't believe it. She probably couldn't either.

The room was completely black.
I hugged her, and she hugged back.
Like a sailor said, quote, "Ain't that a hole in the boat!"


It wasn't the most romantic place for a first kiss, given. It was behind a very noisy nightclub full of drunk and possibly high youths, in a wet alleyway that smelt of wee, with only the muffled bass line of some trashy club song providing the soundtrack.

But it felt romantic.

We had both gone outside to take a break from the chaos inside. However, the yard behind the club was also full of noisy people, so we left through a side gate into the alleyway.

It was horribly dark down the alleyway. The only light came from a lone streetlamp at the far end of the alley. However, even in the gloom, she still looked so beautiful…

It was over in seconds. The way we looked at each other, the way we approached.

The way our lips met…

It was like we were trapped in our own little bubble of perfection, shielded from the dankness around us. The moment couldn't have been so perfect.

Was it a moment? It seems longer than that. Almost like time had stopped for us. I never wanted it to end.

But nothing lasts forever. When it was over, we sort of paused and looked at each other. That atmosphere, that beautiful, romantic atmosphere, was broken, and replaced with one that felt awkward, shy, like we were embarrassed about what had just happened.

We made our excuses to each other and left...

So now, here I am at the bus stop, feeling dazed, unable to comprehend why I feel so… strange. I can't even begin to explain the emotions I feel. It's like a trance; that feeling that mentally, I'm not in reality but physically, I am.

What is this? Why do I feel this way? Is it good? Is it bad? I can't tell.

It's like I've been kicked in the head.
Leslie X Philomena stuff.

I was a big Dean Martin fan when I was (much) younger and I still am. So, yeah, that's who sang the song Leslie is thinking of. Because, y'know "Kick in the Head" being a mugging or an assault was far too unoriginal, so I chose a million year old song.
:trollface:

EDIT: Wow, this must be the most popular thing in my gallery. Thank you all, the lovely people who faved and commented. And, thanks to the person who reccommended this for a Daily Lit Award!

If you want to critique, feel free to point out any grammatical or spelling errors, criticise/praise me on my style of writing and how I, in the words of an English exam, "present my ideas". A little opinion on how I deal with the lovey stuff wouldn't go amiss either, since I've never experienced it myself ^^;
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:iconneko-loverx3:
neko-loverx3 Featured By Owner Feb 23, 2013  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
Hello, I will be critiquing your story :)

Positives:
:bulletgreen: I could not see any spelling mistakes :) (I suck at spelling :<)
:bulletgreen: The writing flows very well
:bulletgreen: You described everything awesomely :D

negatives:
:bulletred: We(the reader) don't know what they (the characters) look like
:bulletred: I don't know.. this was really well written so I can give a very good critic sorry X'C

Sorry that was a terrible critic! I think this is really good so I don't know what to say negativity about it!

Sincerely, :iconcriticentrum:
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:iconellymango:
ellymango Featured By Owner Feb 24, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
;w; D'aww thank you so much! It's quite flattering you liked it so much you couldn't fault it :aww: Perhaps I should give appearances, but I thought it wouldn't fit, being written in first person. Or maybe I'm just lazy :lol:
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:iconneko-loverx3:
neko-loverx3 Featured By Owner Feb 24, 2013  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
Oh that is a good point about it being wrote in 1st person.. :D
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:icondailylitdeviations:
DailyLitDeviations Featured By Owner Nov 12, 2012
Your wonderful literary work has been chosen to be featured by DailyLitDeviations in a news article that can be found here [link]
Be sure to check out the other artists featured and show your support by :+fav:ing the News Article.
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:iconellymango:
ellymango Featured By Owner Nov 13, 2012  Hobbyist Writer
I don't know what to say... thank you sincerly. I'm really honoured.
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:iconleangreenlimabean:
leangreenlimabean Featured By Owner Oct 4, 2012  Student Writer
I love it! And I love the use of the song to drive the story...It's really sweet and nostalgic. Very nice. :)
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:iconellymango:
ellymango Featured By Owner Oct 5, 2012  Hobbyist Writer
;w; Thank you so much! And thank you for the favourite as well! :hug:
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:iconazumadavid:
AzumaDavid Featured By Owner Oct 4, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
AHHHHH *fanboys so much that Northern Ireland EXPLODES*
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:iconellymango:
ellymango Featured By Owner Oct 4, 2012  Hobbyist Writer
Holy crap that was fast. Did you even read it? Thanks for the fave by the way!
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:iconazumadavid:
AzumaDavid Featured By Owner Oct 4, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
>> Why must you under-estimate my reading skeeeells
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